Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Unfulfilled expectations: Making love three times a week?
If you are married, then you've already been disappointed expectations in your home. We all, including me. The expectations are born long before the wedding day.
When my husband and I were engaged, I met a friend who was my parents' age who had been married for 25 years. It was full of enthusiasm. She said that her relationship was very fulfilled and that sex is very important. "We've been married 25 years and we still make love three times a week," she said joyfully.
She also provided valuable advice concerning marriage, but I've neglected. I did not understand what she was saying. My fiance and I waited to be married to start having sex. Assisi, I listened inwardly screaming, "You make love just three times a week and you're happy?" "
I share this anecdote about expectations because it is funny. However, the reality of unfulfilled expectations is not at all, especially when they relate to sexuality in marriage. If you are going through such a situation, you're not alone.
For some, the frustration stems from the lack of intimacy, for others it may arise from the inability to satisfy your spouse. Some couples have expectations as to who will initiate sex. For some, a spouse wants to follow a schedule while in others, spontaneity is the rule.
By marrying, you certainly do not imagine that something as "natural" would become such a big problem. But my friend was right, sex is important. If unmet expectations are not resolved, disappointment, frustration and injuries will become the norm in your home and cause even bigger problems.